Saturday, January 07, 2006

the whore of mensa

I find the idea most fascinating. Merely thinking about it gets me dripping wet. (I meant the drool, silly). My hair begins to stand on end. And not only my hair, to tell you the truth.

Consider this for yourself. Call someone over at an odd hour of the night. Someone unknown to you, preferably mid-twenties, reasonably comely. A sweet smile would be a bonus. Proceed to fulfil your deepest, darkest, most deviant fantasies. Succumb to the exhilarating, overpowering ecstasy, leaving you utterly at the stranger's mercy, begging for more more more.

All at a price, you understand.
No touching, of course, though some are known to be accommodating in that respect. Absolutely no fondling allowed, however. The mind is the mind, the body is the body, and never the twain shall meet.

The whores will discuss, at great depth, any intellectual topic of your preference. You name it. The recurrent motifs in the work of D.H Lawrence. The films of David Lynch. Perhaps even an explanation (if such a thing does exist) of 'Lost Highway'. The pointillist art of Georges-Pierre Seurat. Husserl's phenemology of internal time consciousness. The fugues of Johann Sebastian Bach. Freud's stages of development. The influence of bebop on Beat literature. The list is endless.

Trust me. There's nothing sexier than talking high-brow with a well-informed woman. If you feel uncomfortable about this, just look upon it as a cerebral jerking-off. And of course, you don't need a condom either.

You know what they say. The most erotic organ is between the ears.
Yeah, baby. They got that one right.

P.S.
Read the entire Woody Allen short story here.

5 comments:

Walrus said...

A strange but interesting fantasy sir.

[ok, i just commented so that i could call you 'sir' but to my excessive dissapointment it just doesn't have the same efect as ma'am

i'm still thinking what the male version of ma'am could be...or maybe i should forget about that and go ahead and just call u ma'am]:p

Aran said...

Quite lovely, that story. I thank you for leading me there.

And me? I can't do intellectual to save my life. I'll just serve you butter popcorn and hover in the shadows, taking it all in. Voyeurism, yes.

(Ack! I actually said that!)

melon collie said...

walrus, heh, go on, i'm sure i'd quite enjoy being called ma'am..

aran, yep, woody allen is quite the funny man. looking forward to the butter popcorn. i like it a lil spicy, by the way.

natalie, yea !

JL said...

my girlfriends always poked fun at me, neglecting the muscle men and pretty boys for clever boys and their conversation. nothing quite so sexy sexy as connecting intellectually. i'm glad others agree.

melon collie said...

yep absolutely.
gimme the smart girl any time.

About Me

a recluse waiting for salvation